Friday, September 07, 2007

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Shock Doctor

Product Number: 193
How Much: £14.99
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Whilst the rules I put in place at the start of my Blagman quest help to maintain some sort of order and focus, there’s times they can put me in an awkward position. For example Rule #2 dictates that I must review every product I receive, however Rule #4 insists that I oversee a test of every item so as to ensure the review is fair and by no means misleading. Usually this works out fine with Myself, Marie and various sidekicks taking on various testing roles, but when I received a mouth guard for the under 10’s I had no choice but to test it myself.

This was a little down to my conscience (it would be unfair to ask a child to review something which may or may not cause them an accident when playing sports) and mostly down to the fact I don’t hang around with many 10 year olds that would be willing to test a sports mouthguard, heck they’re probably far too busy playing Wii Sports instead to worry about real sports (not that the prospect of someone letting go of the Wii Remote accidentally and throwing it at your face doesn’t warrant mouth protection).

But I digress. After exhausting my options of testers and refusing to go to a park and suggesting kids put an unknown object in to their mouths (the Political Correctness brigade would be all over that sort of comment) I settled down with the mouth guard and gave it a thorough once over. In terms of packaging the device is well protected in transit and comes with a handy carry case perfect for taking it to sports games and Wii Sports parties.

To set the guard to your teeth you simply pop it in warm water and then place it in to your mouth, clamping down until the guard sets in the position of your teeth. Well actually you need to leave the guard to cool for a little bit first so it’s not hot to touch, and naturally you won’t want to leave it too long or it will reset without a nice imprint of your nashers. Despite not being able to get a true representation of my own teeth (being for under-12’s it was too small for my big gob) I was able to get a feel for the guard, and the part of my mouth I was able to fit inside did leave a nice tooth imprint. After leaving the device for sometime I popped the guard back in and found it still fitted perfectly.

Taking a few gentle knocks to my own teeth with the guard on (as opposed to a full on rugby tackle which the guard will also be equally effective with) I found it was very resilient and that the hard coating at the front was able to absorb the shock.

Although I was unable to give the guard a complete test, I’m also somewhat relieved I didn’t have to wear a real guard and run in to a field full on 6ft 5 rugby players to carry out my test. All in all my micro test was a success and I can recommend the guard to anyone that is looking for a way to protect their pearly whites. And if you can’t take my word for it then the $10,000 insurance that comes with the guard, should be more than enough too. Sure beats a trip to the dentist.

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