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If my Tamagotchi parenting skills are anything to go by I shouldn’t be allowed kids for quite some time. After arriving from Bandai last weekend Marie did the motherly thing of caring for our newborn Tamagotchi with regular meals, regular cleanups and even turning the light off at bedtime. All was well and then the weekend finished, Marie went to work and I was left to look after our newborn throughout the day. Oh dear…


Now generally my track record with this kind of toy isn’t very good. Back when they first came out all those years ago I went for the cheaper unofficial ‘Nekopet’ substitutes. This would be my first lesson in not buying inferior products as at school one day we had a bet to see who could drop theirs the furthest without it breaking. I started, dropped mine from about 5cm in the air and my Nekopet died never to be seen again.

With that it mind I took on my new role of parenting with cautious steps. This time around I wouldn’t resort my baby to any freefalling experiments, bets on or off. For the first day everything went well, mostly I got on with the day-to-day tasks of being Blagman and attended to the occasional beep. I even found the time to play some games with my Tamagotchi. These include a game where you catch falling music notes from the sky, a game where you have to bump other Tamagotchi’s out of the way and a guessing game. Playing these games gave me points which I then spent on some more games and a trumpet.


As you can see he loved his little trumpet and all was well with the world. As for day 2 things didn’t go so well. Marie had told me that if he was sad for no reason then I should discipline him. Makes sense I though, and sure enough at one point his food bar was full yet he wasn’t happy. I tried playing games, unlocking stuff online at tamatown.com, giving him his favourite flute and even praising him but nothing seemed to do the trick. So as a parent at the end of my rope I raised my hand high in to the air and bought it down hard on the discipline option. After a good spanking he was still sad. So I disciplined him a few more times and probably caused some serious psychological damage (The Tamagotchi therapists will be busy for years).

Turns out all he wanted was some snacks, so after feeding him cakes and ice cream he felt a lot better. The great thing was he still seemed to love me all the same. You’d think after all this Marie would be shocked what I had done to her baby, not so, when she got home she purchased some make up and a bow and preceded to get our male Tamagotchi to try them out. And the weird thing was he actually loved the bow. Guess I did cause some psychological damage after all.


So whether you’re a good parent or a bad parent it doesn’t really matter, your Tamagotchi will love you all the same. Which to be honest is probably for the best. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to take care of some 9AM feedings.

Tamagotchi version 3 is available from all good toy stores. You can purchase one online at Amazon.co.uk here, or head over to Tamatown.com to win prizes for your Tamagotchi. And naturally for all things Tamagotchi you can head to Tamagotchi.com or Bandai.co.uk.